A TRIBUTE TO EDUCATED AMERICA (NON-FICTION)
Dearly intellectualized, we are gathered here today to mourn the passing of our dear friend, Educated America. She is preceded in passing by her grandmother, Necessity and her mother, Invention, as well as her brothers, Common and Sense. An underlying cause of death was malignant discontent, but it was complicated by an acute overdose of Popular Culture. It is suspected that a fling with Snooki gave her the fatal infection.
Educated America began her life in a small, one room school house. It began simply, with the three R’s; Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic. She had a practical upbringing, long on conservation, thrift, and ingenuity. As she matured into a teenager, she learned Latin, Geometry, and adored classic Literature. She relived History, and more importantly, learned from the mistakes of those before her. It was she that first noticed the aggressive tendencies of Hitler, Mussolini, and Stalin. She and her disciples first warned us of the coming genocide we later termed “The Holocaust”.
Her upbringing in mechanical science and engineering served us well as we were forced to ramp a depressed economy into a wartime production juggernaut. Her inventiveness was on display as our nation produced some of the most complex machinery the world has seen. Not all of her effort was aimed toward destruction, as her humanitarian side helped rebuild war torn nations.
Following the return of our service men and women, she gave birth to her first child, GI Bill. GI Bill helped millions of Americans improve their lives, and began the boom that propelled our country to even greater heights. All the lessons we learned in her prime; design, production; consumerism; economic efficiency; came together, and for 20 glorious years, we showed the world the might of an Educated America.
Her 50’s and 60’s culminated in the landing of Apollo 11 on the surface of the moon. In less than 67 years, Educated America took land bound humans and placed them in the Heavens. Sadly, it would be one of her last hurrahs.
Her success led to her downfall. An exploding middle class, driven by the success she brought, became more and more materialistic. It became less about knowledge and more about the things that knowledge produced. Her early success lead to the Establishment, and Popular Culture was born to fight it.
Popular Culture produced the Radicals, who quickly ran through all she had done, and soon pronounced it “unclean”. The Radicals later morphed into Yuppies and Materials Girls, who cared less about why and more about when. Her 70s and 80s did produce her wonderful grandchildren, Electronics and Computing.
As she weakened in her 90’s, Popular Culture took a firmer hold on her body. Television and eventually, Internet, began distracting those of the younger generation that needed her the most. Instead of reading the classics, Americans began watching “The Real World”. Instead of studying history, the newest generation soon became dependant on the placebo now known as “Hollywood”.
She took her last breaths as our great nation teetered on the brink of insolvency. By ignoring her teachings, Americans believed they could get something for nothing, and by ignoring history, they overlooked the bubble they stood on. They allowed others to take advantage of their own greed and stupidity, and then cried the words that sent her into the deathbed; “But it’s not FAIR!!!!!”
As we send her home, we should all stand together, and say, “Do not go gentle into that good night; Rage, Rage, against the dying of the light”. For we have lost our dear friend; shall we compound the tragedy by losing the things she has taught us?
Educated America began her life in a small, one room school house. It began simply, with the three R’s; Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic. She had a practical upbringing, long on conservation, thrift, and ingenuity. As she matured into a teenager, she learned Latin, Geometry, and adored classic Literature. She relived History, and more importantly, learned from the mistakes of those before her. It was she that first noticed the aggressive tendencies of Hitler, Mussolini, and Stalin. She and her disciples first warned us of the coming genocide we later termed “The Holocaust”.
Her upbringing in mechanical science and engineering served us well as we were forced to ramp a depressed economy into a wartime production juggernaut. Her inventiveness was on display as our nation produced some of the most complex machinery the world has seen. Not all of her effort was aimed toward destruction, as her humanitarian side helped rebuild war torn nations.
Following the return of our service men and women, she gave birth to her first child, GI Bill. GI Bill helped millions of Americans improve their lives, and began the boom that propelled our country to even greater heights. All the lessons we learned in her prime; design, production; consumerism; economic efficiency; came together, and for 20 glorious years, we showed the world the might of an Educated America.
Her 50’s and 60’s culminated in the landing of Apollo 11 on the surface of the moon. In less than 67 years, Educated America took land bound humans and placed them in the Heavens. Sadly, it would be one of her last hurrahs.
Her success led to her downfall. An exploding middle class, driven by the success she brought, became more and more materialistic. It became less about knowledge and more about the things that knowledge produced. Her early success lead to the Establishment, and Popular Culture was born to fight it.
Popular Culture produced the Radicals, who quickly ran through all she had done, and soon pronounced it “unclean”. The Radicals later morphed into Yuppies and Materials Girls, who cared less about why and more about when. Her 70s and 80s did produce her wonderful grandchildren, Electronics and Computing.
As she weakened in her 90’s, Popular Culture took a firmer hold on her body. Television and eventually, Internet, began distracting those of the younger generation that needed her the most. Instead of reading the classics, Americans began watching “The Real World”. Instead of studying history, the newest generation soon became dependant on the placebo now known as “Hollywood”.
She took her last breaths as our great nation teetered on the brink of insolvency. By ignoring her teachings, Americans believed they could get something for nothing, and by ignoring history, they overlooked the bubble they stood on. They allowed others to take advantage of their own greed and stupidity, and then cried the words that sent her into the deathbed; “But it’s not FAIR!!!!!”
As we send her home, we should all stand together, and say, “Do not go gentle into that good night; Rage, Rage, against the dying of the light”. For we have lost our dear friend; shall we compound the tragedy by losing the things she has taught us?
